Checking In - Week 4

Quick check in this morning! First, remember when I went off about how I was going to be soooo committed to exercise? That was before I got sick. Over Christmas. :( Between laziness, swollen tonsils, and lots of Christmas goodies combined with me plastered to the couch instead of the treadmill I expected to gain a few this week.

I was pleasantly surprised to find that I couldn't eat as much as I wanted to over the holidays. I ate moderately, relaxed, enjoyed the holiday with my family, and, sure, gained a little weight. The result?

192.2 lbs.

Less than a pound. Over Christmas! Which I can easily lose this week if I put in a little effort. Luckily, my tonsils have returned to a normal size, although my throat is still sore from the coughing and hacking and my nose is all red from the incessant blowing. But I'm a little on the mend. Hopefully. Which means no excuses for eating. But the exercise is still going to have to wait.

As are the measurements. No point in depressing myself over Christmas. :) Measurements will have to wait until next week!

Exercise - My Biggest Challenge

**WARNING**

This is a big long post of me mostly rambling and complaining about how hard it is for me to workout. Read at your own risk.

Exercise is the hardest part of getting healthy for me. All of it is hard, but exercise is the most difficult. I really struggle with finding the time, motivating myself to get it done, and keeping up with it consistently.

I LOVE the way I feel after I've worked out! AFTER. Not before. Not during. Just after. I do not love exercise. But I know it's good for me and I know that I need it to achieve my goals. Because, you see, I don't just want to be skinny. I want to be toned and healthy. I want to have increased energy. I want to be active. And losing weight isn't going to get me there. It will help. It's part of it. But it isn't enough.

So exercise is becoming my priority this week. Yep. The week of Christmas. When I'm crazy busy with finishing up shopping and wrapping and cooking and activities. Because if I can't get to it when life is crazy I know I just won't get to it when things are "normal".

#1

There are several factors that making working out a challenge for me. First and foremost is SLEEP. I heart sleep. More than almost anything in the world. I always have. Growing up, my alarm would go off and I'd hit the snooze button. My dad would come downstairs to find me with a glass of water. He would threaten to pour it on me if I didn't get up. And a lot of the time, he followed through on that threat. A lot. So I would get up and immediately get in the shower. I would go to the bathroom, lock the door, turn on the steamy hot water, climb in, and lay down and go back to sleep in the bath tub with the shower water spraying on me. Heaven. Until my dad came down banging on my door. :) I was late for 99% of high school. I just wanted to sleep!

Right now, my beloved sleep is very, very compromised. I am not at all in control over when I go to sleep, how many times I wake up during the night, or what time I get up in the morning. I get to go to sleep AFTER I get all three kids to sleep. Which wasn't until eleven last night. (I put them to bed at eight. Grrrrrrr.) Lucas then decided to wake frequently last night. Wouldn't trade that boy for the world, but MAN would I love a long stretch of sleep! And then of course I had to get up this morning to get Payson off to school.

That said, I could be better. Sometimes I stay up late after the kids go to bed just to savor the child-free quiet. When I should just tuck myself in and take advantage of sleep. Or I fall asleep on the couch in front of the tv. Again, sleeping in my own bed would provide a much better night of rest. And I really should start to sleep train Lucas. It's just so hard to think of letting him cry. First of all, it just breaks my heart into pieces! And second, he'll wake up the others. Which will be a nightmare. But if I just do it, it will only last a few days (hopefully) and then I'd possibly get a better night of rest.

Anyway, sleep is a challenge. One that I am committed to working on starting tonight. I will put myself to bed, in my bed, at a decent time. And Lucas will sleep in his bed. Not in mine. And hopefully that will make a little difference. Although I will still be up at night to feed him. And who knows if the others will throw fits like last night.

#2

Enough about sleep. It frustrates me to think about it. My second challenge with exercise is time. Making time. Finding time. Using my time wisely.

I know myself well enough to know that if the workout isn't done first thing in the morning, it's not going to happen. Because I sweat. Like a mad woman. My face drips like crazy! People who see me working out are always concerned that I'm going to pass out or have a stroke or something. I'm not. I'm fine. I just sweat a lot. It's genetic. The whole fam is face sweaters. And if I workout, I'm going to have to shower. And if I'm going to have to shower, I'm going to have to take the time to do my hair and get ready. And my hair is high-maintenance. I wish it wasn't. Because I'm really a pretty low-maintenance kind of girl. But my hair doesn't understand that.

So if I work out, I have to get ready. Which cuts into my time in the day to get things done. And lets face it, there just isn't enough time in the day to get everything done. Especially when I'm husband-less and have to do it all by myself.

Then of course there's the baby. Sometimes he is needy. He's actually a very low-maintenance baby. But he tends to want something when I want me-time. And there's feeding him. Which is really time consuming and energy-sapping.

And then there's the part where I can do better. Using my time wisely. If I would get off the computer or turn off the tv a little more often, I would get a lot more done. It's true. I used to be really good about not watching tv. Lately I haven't been so good. I need to work on that. And I need to leave the computer for evenings, AFTER the important things get done.

#3

And last workout challenge is motivation. Just getting off my butt and doing it. And that comes down to commitment, really. How badly do I want it? Because I say I want to workout. But do I want to workout MORE than I want to not workout? Obviously, the answer to that in the past has been no. I would rather NOT workout and do other things than push myself and get the workouts in and enjoy the benefits.

And that is why I'm making a commitment now. It has to be a priority. Even if that means I sacrifice something else that is important.

Right now, I am absolutely not willing to sacrifice my sleep. I tried. It didn't work. It made me stressed and tired and grumpy and it made me hate working out, when I already dislike exercise enough.

So with my 3 challenging factors, I can work on two of them. I can work on my commitment level. And I can work on how I use my time. It might mean that I'm not showered and ready for the day until 2 in the afternoon. It might mean that my house is only cleaned when Jason is home to help me. It might mean that other activities get pushed aside. But this is just for now. I will not always be up at night with a baby. I will not always be breastfeeding. Life will change over time and I'll be able to adjust the routine.

In the mean time, I will be making workouts a priority. I will start slow. I will make sure that I'm eating enough. I will sleep when I need sleep. But I will also make sure that I get a workout in. Because if I don't make it a priority now, it's never going to happen.

Checking In - Week 3

The holidays are proving to be a little challenging, but I'm managing to find a balance between enjoying the goodies and parties and shopping and watching myself carefully. Shopping seems to be harder than the parties for me, actually. At the parties I PLAN. I know what I'm going to let myself do going in. But when I'm out shopping I tend to end up being out longer than I expect and not packing snacks or having to eat out and making worse choices. It's tough! But I'm trying to make up for it on the days I'm home and know I can make the best choices.

Anyway, here are the week's results! On Monday, December 12th I was 194 pounds. As of this morning I was 191.4 pounds! Another 2.6 pounds down! Overall I have lost 28.2 pounds and brought my BMI down FIVE points from my highest weight!

I'm trying to focus on those numbers. The "how far I've come" numbers, rather than the "how far I've got to go" set. Because those are pretty overwhelming. I've set some lofty goals for myself in the coming months and I know there will be some disappointments alongside the triumphs. I just need to focus on how well I'm doing and keep the discouragement at bay.

Because I've lost almost 30 pounds!! Over 50 if you look at my highest weight in July. I'm working hard! And I've kept it up for a few months. Which means it's becoming a HABIT to eat this way. And that's more important than how far I have to go.

Surviving the Holidays

From the end of October through the first of January is the hardest time of the year to lose weight. Halloween candy, Thanksgiving feasts, and Christmas goodies and parties seem to lurk around every corner!

That Halloween candy just lingers around for weeks and weeks, sitting in bowls on kitchen counters and screaming at us every time we walk by. By the time it's gone, Thanksgiving leftovers are begging to be eaten for days after the holiday feast is over. And the second we make it through Thanksgiving the Christmas parties begin. And when you're not standing in front of a holiday party spread, some sweet neighbor is probably knocking at your door with a plate of some homemade deliciousness that is just too hard to pass up. Even then, it doesn't end at Christmas. We munch on leftovers for a week, finishing them off just in time for one last food-filled holiday bash on New Year's Eve.

In the past I've just given up entirely, indulged through the holiday months, and then tried to undo the damage with the rest of the world by setting a New Year's resolution to lose the weight that I will inevitably fail. Which will make me feel like crap. So I'll go eat something delicious to make myself feel better.

This year I have managed to change this ridiculous pattern of behavior and I've lost over 25 pounds during the seemingly impossible holiday months! Halloween proved challenging, but I survived. Thanksgiving was difficult, but not impossible. And last night I survived my first Christmas party without doing too much damage! So I thought I'd share some tips.

#1: The holidays are not an excuse. I forced myself to face the truth this year: Just because there are holiday parties and everything seems to revolve around food, that doesn't give me any excuses. I still need to eat like a normal person. This means that I don't get to "enjoy the holidays" by eating everything in sight. It means that I eat like a normal person! I eat regular healthy meals every day. That way when the holiday party arrives, I don't have to feel guilty about have one or two little treats. Sure, maybe I'll gain a little the night of the party. But eating normally again the next few days will bring those pounds right back off and then some!

#2: There's gotta be a plan. I can not walk into a room full of delicious, fatty foods and goodies and hold it together. I just can't. So I have to have a plan of action before I show up. Sometimes that means eat a healthy dinner before going and then allow myself a treat or two. Sometimes it's bringing my own healthy options. Whatever it is, I need to make decisions before I show up and my stomach is growling and I can smell all the yumminess and my inner fat girl takes over and eats everything.

#3: Keep the water coming. I take my water bottle with me everywhere I go. I keep it full and I sip on it constantly. It keeps me hydrated. It keeps me from feeling hungry even when I'm not. It keeps me from putting other things in my mouth. I once read that it's really common to mistake hunger for thirst. I find myself feeling "hungry" a lot. But if I drink a glass of water I'm fine. Obviously I wasn't really hungry in the first place. It keeps me from over eating. Water is my favorite.

#4: Nothing is off limits. The truth is, it's the holidays. And the holidays are to be ENJOYED! And part of enjoying the holidays is enjoying the treats. So far I've had cupcakes, chocolates, and hot cocoa. And I plan on having more of my favorites at upcoming events. The key is in moderation. I'm not eating everything at every event or every day. But I'm not going to say no to everything either.

Finding the balance may be difficult. But it's not impossible! There are still skinny people left in the world come January every year! Which means there IS a way to do this without completely sabotaging myself! So here's the a healthy Christmas and a skinny New Year!!

Orzo Vegetable Soup

I'm not a huge salad person. The salads I like are the kind that have more fat and calories than a Big Mac. So I get my vegetables in soups instead. Yes, even in the summer. Because soups are my favorite. Soup, how I love thee! Let me count the ways:

*There's only one pot to clean when I'm done.

*Loads of hearty veggies for little calories and fat.

*They're really easy to make (most of the time)!

*There are about 4 trillion different healthy soup recipes out there.

*I can use up what's in my fridge.

*They're CHEAP to make and still feed a LOT of people! :)

*They're warm and filling.

*I can make one pot of soup and have a quick, easy, and delicious lunch for the whole week! Soup leftovers are the best!

*They're delicious.

Okay, that wasn't really counting. I just wanted to make a list of reason I love soup.

This particular soups is a new favorite. It's snowing outside. I wanted something warm, but I wanted something quick and easy that would be low calorie/fat and warm me up inside. Also, I sort of just wanted to use up some of the veggies in my fridge before they go bad. Soup is the best for that! So I literally threw this together while I was cleaning. Chopped some veggies, threw some stuff in the pot, let it simmer while I cleaned, added the pasta at the end, cleaned a little more, and by the time my family room was sparkling I was ready for a hot lunch!

I ate 2 1/2 cups of this stuff for only 287 calories and 1 gram of fat! Two and a half cups! That's a lot of soup. You could have a smaller bowl with a side salad, some crusty bread, whatever. It was delicious enough to eat on it's own. But I may have it tomorrow with some dry whole wheat toast for dipping. Mmmmm. Leftover soup is the best!

Orzo Vegetable Soup

INGREDIENTS:

1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil

1 small onion, chopped

2 medium stalks celery, chopped

2 cloves of garlic, minced

1 cup carrots, sliced (about 1 large carrot or 10 baby carrots)

1 medium zucchini, quartered and sliced

1/4 head of red cabbage, sliced into thin shreds

2 medium red potatoes, cut into 1/2 inch cubes

4 (15 oz) cans of vegetable broth

1 1/2 tsp Italian seasoning

1 cup orzo pasta

Heat oil in a pot over medium heat. Saute onion, celery, and garlic until soft. Add remaining vegetables and cook until cabbage wilts down to about half it's size. Add 2 cans of broth and seasoning and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for about 30 minutes. (This is the part where you go clean or nap or whatever floats your boat. Just check on your soup once or twice.) Add remaining 2 cans of broth and return to a boil. Add in orzo pasta and boil for about 9 minutes. Remove from heat and serve!

Makes 8 servings.

Nutritional Information:

115 calories, 0.5g fat, 972mg sodium, 25g carbs, 2.6g fiber, 3.5g protein

The Clean Plate Club

I'm a life-long member. I probably always will be. And I really don't think there is anything wrong with that!

You see, back in "the day" parents always made sure their children finished the food on their plates. Their reasoning? To make sure their children ate their vegetables, to avoid waste, because it's what their parents did... I'm sure they had plenty of reasons.

And then portion sizes blew up and so did parents. Kids started to blow up right along with them. So we started hearing that IT'S OKAY to not lick your plate clean. Stop when you're satisfied. Good advice, right?

In theory, yes. We really should fuel our bodies when we feel hungry and stop when we're satisfied. But after years of training my body to just eat as much as I could of whatever tasted delicious until I made myself sick, it's really hard to figure this out. So I don't.

Instead I serve myself normal sized portions, and 99% of the time I eat every last bite. I just finish what's on my plate. Because I'm consuming a very low amount of calories right now. I need every one of the calories I put on my plate.

I'm still flexible. If I've over-served myself, I stop eating when I realize I'm starting to feel full. And if I finish and find myself hungry a while later, I allow myself an extra helping or a snack.

But most of the time I just eat what's on my plate. And I'm okay with being a member of the clean plate club.

Snack Time! Baked Zucchini Chips

If I have a little extra time for a snack, this is one of my new favorites. I've made it as a snack and as a meal and both are fantastic!! Yes, it takes much more energy than a piece of fruit, some pre-chopped veggies, or a granola bar or something. But it tastes sooooo good!!

Baked Zucchini Chips

INGREDIENTS:

1 medium-large zucchini, sliced as thin as you want (I usually do about 1/8-1/4 inch thick)

1/4 cup seasoned bread crumbs

1/4 cup parmesan cheese

1 egg white

pepper to taste

non-stick cooking spray

Pre-heat over to 475 degrees. Spray a cookie sheet with non-stick cooking spray. Crack egg white into one bowl. Mix parmesan cheese and bread crumbs in a seperate bowl. Dip zucchini slices into egg whites, then breadcrumbs, coating thoroughly. Place on cookie sheet. Spray tops with non-stick spray. Bake for 5 minutes, then flip and bake another 5 minutes.

Makes 1 serving.

Nutritional Information:

282 calories, 8.4g fat, 934mg sodium, 32g carbs, 4.8g fiber, 21.8g protein

I dip these in 1/4-1/2 cup marinera sauce and they're delicious!! We even made them once and covered them in sauce and cheese, re-baked them, and then served them over whole wheat pasta with a side salad. (I'll have to share that recipe sometimes soon!) Delicious healthy meal!!

Checking In - Week 2

Oh dear. I don't know why I let Tiffany have so much control over me. But per her suggestion I am now taking - and sharing - progress pictures.

I'm calling this my before picture. It's the best I've got while not pregnant, before losing any weight on purpose.

No, I don't know why my husband thought it was "funny" to throw his leg over me like that. But I'm sort of grateful that he's hiding some of the flab.

Keep in mind that aside from being VERY overweight still (technically obese, although I just can't bring myself to think about it too long) these next pictures were taken just after I got out of bed and threw my workout clothes on. No hair, no make up, no pretty. Just me. In sweats and a t-shirt. Please be kind.

Also, these pictures were taken by my 6 year old. And they're probably better than the photos I usually take. Sad.

Here I am, in all my glory. Hey, at least my nails look nice, right? Oh, you can't see them? Crap.

As you can see I have curves. Hips and thighs have always been my least favorite feature. They were wide enough before having children. Three kids have NOT helped one bit. Although neither has cheesecake.

Side view. Wow. I'm a bit of a hunchback. Gotta start working on that posture!

And to be fair, I was totally sucking in for that one. This is reality. Apparently I still look very pregnant. No fun.

But now that we have those scary (and depressing) "during" pictures out of the way, I can share the good news!!

Tiffany also encouraged me to start taking measurements every two weeks. I took my first measurements on November 30th, so it hasn't quite been 2 weeks yet, but Monday's are just easier to check in, you know?

So here's the GOOD news!

WEIGHT:

194 lbs.

Yay! Down another 2.8 pounds!! Down anything is good, but almost three pounds feels great!!

MEASUREMENTS:

Bicep 13.5 in

Chest 42 in

Waist 38 in

Hips 47 in

Thighs 28.75 in

That's a total of 6.25 inches lost!! Yay!! That means that even though I don't feel like I can see much of a difference, something is happening!!

I may not love posting these pictures of myself right now. But the idea of looking back at these photos a month or two from now makes me excited. I can't wait to have something to reference so that I really can see how far I've come. Already, even though some days it doesn't feel like much, I know I've come a long way. Down more than 50 pounds from my highest weight, and down more than 25 pounds in just 2 1/2 months. That's definitely something to be proud of!

Baked Vegetable Egg Rolls

Who doesn't love Chinese food?! But grabbing Chinese take out isn't so good for my waistline. So when I found this healthy recipe I got pretty excited! I went out and bought chopsticks, Asian soup spoons, and dip bowls. Then I invited my sisters over for a girls night. And we all loved the food!!

We had Baked Vegetable Egg Rolls and Egg Drop Soup. Unfortunately, we started eating BEFORE taking pictures, so the soup was pretty much gone. I'll have to make it again, take better pictures, and share the recipe later. For now, enjoy these!

(Warning: These took a little longer than I usually spend in the kitchen, but they were so good they are totally worth the extra time!!)

Baked Vegetable Egg Rolls

Original recipe found HERE.

Ingredients:

1 tbsp vegetable oil

2 garlic cloves, minced

1 inch fresh ginger root

4 ounces mushrooms

2 medium carrots

3 medium green onions

1 small head green cabbage

1/4 cup soy sauce

1/2 tbsp corn starch

1 tsp sesame oil

1 package egg roll wrappers (20 wrappers in a package)

non stick cooking spray

Prepare your veggies. Peel and grate ginger. Peel and grate carrots. Mince garlic. Clean and slice the green onions and mushrooms. Peel the outer layer or two from the cabbage, cut into quarters, cut out the core, and then cut cabbage into thin shreds.

Heat oil in a wok or skillet over medium heat. Saute ginger, garlic, and green onion for 1-2 minutes. Add the mushrooms and saute about 5 more minutes or until mushrooms are soft. Add carrot for 1 more minute, then add cabbage. Turn the heat up to medium-high and cook and stir often until the cabbage reduces by about half.

Stir together the cornstarch and soy sauce and pour over the veggies. Drizzle with sesame oil and stir to coat. Turn off the heat and adjust the flavor if you'd like. I added a touch more soy sauce.

Pre-heat oven to 425 degrees. Cover a baking sheet with tin foil. Fill each wrapper with about 1/4 cup of the veggie mixture. To see a great photo tutorial on how to wrap the rolls, see the original recipe HERE. Place the egg rolls on your baking sheet and spray with non-stick spray. Turn them over and spray the other side.

Bake for 20 minutes or until crispy and light brown, turning once about half way through.

Makes 10 servings.

Nutritional Facts per 2 Rolls:

233 calories, 3g fat, 706mg sodium, 43.4g carbs, 2.7g fiber, 7.7g protein

We dipped our egg rolls in spicy mustard and sweet and sour sauce. Delish!! And the whole meal? Rolls, soup, and dips? Under 400 calories!! I HIGHLY recommend you try these!

Baked Parmesan Tomatoes

Snack time! When I'm eating healthy I find I need to eat OFTEN. I try to eat smaller meals. And my snacks seem to be tiny meals a lot of the time, too. I'm not a big fan of carrot and celery sticks for snacks every day. I want something yummy. And warm in the winter time. So for one my snacks today I'm having Baked Parmesan Tomatoes over toast. Yum!!!

Baked Parmesan Tomatoes

Original recipe found HERE.

Ingredients:

4 medium tomatoes, halved

1/4 cup grated parmesan cheese

1 tsp dried oregano

1/4 tsp salt

black pepper, to taste

4 tsp extra virgin olive oil

Pre-heat oven to 450 degrees. Place tomatoes cut-side up on a baking sheet. Top with parmesan cheese, oregano, salt, and pepper. Drizzle with olive oil and bake for about 15 minutes or until tomatoes are tender.

Makes 4 servings.

Nutritional Facts per Tomato:

85 calories, 6g fat, 228mg sodium, 5g carbs, 1.6g fiber, 3g protein

Even with the toast, this snack came it under 200 calories. Perfect! Very Italian. Delicious and light, but filling. And easy to make for one or many!

Hawaiian BBQ Pizza on Whole Wheat Thin Crust

Yay! My first recipe!! I'm so excited to share this!

I have certain rules for dinner. I try to cook about 4 times a week, leaving a couple of nights for leftovers and eating out or ordering pizza once. On the nights I cook my rules are simple:

#1 I don't want to waste my entire day/night in the kitchen. If it takes more than an hour, it's not going to happen. And 30 minutes is really what I like to spend in the kitchen.

#2 I don't want to have to buy fancy gadgets. I have minimal kitchen space and I don't like wasting money on a lot of tools. There are a few things I have splurged on (like my immersible blender for soups!) but I'm not going to go out and buy something if I don't already have it.

#3 I'm only cooking ONE meal. I am not a personal chef. I'm going to make one meal for my entire family. If they try it and they don't like it, fine. But I'm not making anything else. If you hate it that much, you are welcome to make yourself some serious or a sandwich.

#4 Yes, I need something healthy, but I'm not eating cardboard or rabbit food. It's gotta taste good!

Easy enough, right?

I've been wanting to come up with a yummy Hawaiian BBQ Pizza for a while and tonight I finally got around to it. And I have to say it turned out really good! I'll definitely make it again.

And just so you know, I'm not a photographer. I don't own a fancy camera. I'm not going to wait for the right lighting to take my pictures. Maybe one day I'll have a better camera, but I'm never going to be a professional photographer. So no complaining about my crappy photos!! :)

Hawaiian BBQ Pizza on Whole Wheat Thin Crust

(That's one slice. Just so you know, I ate two for dinner. And yes, I eat my pizza with a fork. I'm weird.)

Ingredients:

DOUGH

2 tsp active dry yeast

2/3 cup warm water

2 tsp honey

1 1/3 cup wheat flour

2 tbsp and 2 tsp wheat germ

1/2 tsp salt

TOPPINGS

1/2 cup BBQ sauce

2 cups shredded cheese (I used 1/2 mozzarella, 1/2 cheddar)

1 cup chopped red onion

1 cup pineapple chunks or tidbits

Start with the dough. I'm not a baker. I like easy recipes. I don't mess with proofing the yeast correctly or really even letting dough rise much. I like EASY recipes.

Combine the honey, warm water (just slightly warmer than room temperature, not hot), and yeast. Stir to dissolve and set aside for about 5 minutes.

Combine flour, wheat germ, and salt. Make a little well. Dump in the yeast mixture. Combine with a spoon.

Spray some non-stick cooking spray on your hands and use them to mix the dough until most of the flour is incorporated and you form a ball with the dough.

Cover with a towel and allow to rise 10-15 minutes. Meanwhile, pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.

The dough really won't rise noticeably. No worries! Roll it out THIN. I don't even bother using a floured surface, but you can if you're worried about the dough sticking to your counter.

Place your rolled out dough on a cookie sheet sprayed with non-stick spray and bake for 8-10 minutes.

Remove pizza crust and turn the oven heat up to 400 degrees.

Spread BBQ sauce with a spoon. (I don't use a lot of sauce. I like a slightly drier pizza.) Top with cheese. Add onions and pineapple. (I LOVE red onion. This is a LOT of red onion. And I chop it into larger chunks. If you're not a big onion fan, use less or leave it off entirely.)

Bake again for about 15 minutes or until edges are light brown and cheese is melted.

Makes 8 slices.

Nutritional Facts per Slice:

251 calories, 10g fat, 655mg sodium, 31.5g carbs, 4.3g fiber, 9.5g sugar, 11g protein

Not perfectly healthy. But not bad, especially for pizza! And super delicious. Hope you enjoy! If you try it, let me know what you think!!

Food!!

The BIGGEST part of losing weight is FOOD. Someone said to me the other day, "I just wish I didn't have to workout in order to lose weight." I sort of wanted to laugh. Because you don't! Working out helps you build muscle tone, which DOES burn calories faster than fat. But it isn't very affective for weight loss if your eating isn't in check.

On the other hand, I could do no physical activity and eat healthy within the right calorie limit and I'd drop pounds. Obviously, that wouldn't be optimally healthy, but it's true. So I focus more of my energy on what I eat and do a little exercise on the side.

When I first started trying to lose weight (about four million years ago) I thought the only way to eat was like a rabbit. Vegetables. Salads. A little fruit. No carbs. Brothy soups. Blech. Boring. I just can't eat that way! I like food that TASTES good! I want food that makes me excited to eat, that I can enjoy! I don't want to force myself to eat foods that I don't like.

So I don't! If it doesn't taste good, I'm not going to eat it. If it doesn't fill me up, it's not worth it. Does this mean I absolutely crave and love everything I eat? Like pizza and cheesecake? No. Sometimes I just really, really love things. Sometimes I just like them okay. But most of the time I eat foods that I really, really, really like!

The other thing is getting the family to eat it. I have a somewhat picky family. My hubby will try anything I ask him to (almost). He may not request it on a regular basis, but he'll eat it. And the kids will try it because I make them. :) I will not make them eat something they really, honestly don't like. But I also won't cook two separate meals. And I can tell the difference between "I reeeeeally hate mushrooms!" and "I would so rather be eating pizza right now!" with the kids.

I don't expect them to love everything I make. I made a vegetable stir fry tonight (recipe coming soon!) full of cabbage and green onions and bell peppers and water chestnuts. I don't expect them to pick this for their birthday dinner. But unless it's making them gag, they can probably handle it just fine. Know what I mean?

Also, my kids are really good at seeing vegetables on their plates and immediately starting to whine that they don't like this. I'll remind them that they haven't tried it yet, or they've had it before and liked it just fine. But they continue to whine. I always promise that I am only going to make them try it. And USUALLY they end up eating everything.

This happened the other day at Tiffany's house. I had a huge pot of minestrone soup (recipe also coming soon!) and I took it to her house to share. Payson immediately whined about how she hated this stuff. I promised her she'd live if she tried it. She continued to whine. And then she ate the whole bowl. Awesome!

I plan to start sharing my favorite recipes soon. I could share them right this very second, but who wants just a recipe? Everyone wants pictures. And I don't have those. Yet. But as I start making each of those recipes I will take pictures and promise to post recipes and photos of the foods we eat around here on a regular basis to help you plan healthy meals and to show you that healthy eating doesn't have to taste like rabbit food!

Support and Accountability

So far I've mentioned a few things I'm doing to shed the pounds. Eating healthy, being a vegetarian, exercise, setting goals and having rewards, counting calories (the easy way!). But my secret weapon is Tiffany.

Tiffany and I go back a ways. We met the Spring/Summer of 2004. We were newlyweds living in the same apartment complex in Rexburg, Idaho. We were both pregnant and met at church one Sunday. Tiffany and I would walk together on the treadmills at our apartment clubhouse and share pregnancy details. I adore her.

Jason and I moved after about 5 months and Tiffany and I lost touch. Tiff kept a blog and one day I contacted her because I wanted to start one. (See what you started, Tiffany?? This is my FIFTH blog!!) We kept in touch through blogging and emails here and there. And then Tiffany lost a lot of weight and I started to pick her brain.

As you know, I eventually stopped focusing on weight loss and we lost touch a little again. When I moved back to Utah, we reconnected.

Tiffany decided to start doing some personal wellness coaching and I wanted in! She has a Bachelor's degree in Health Science and is currently studying to become a personal trainer. She's also a Beach Body coach and has started doing Workout Challenge Groups with P90X. I had started losing the weight again on my own. I had been looking into hiring a personal trainer, but there were none in my area. And even if there had been, those guys are PRICEY!!

So I called Tiff. We talked for a while and I decided I needed her! Since then Tiffany has been in daily contact with me and has really helped me to succeed.

When I was feeling a total lack of motivation to workout one day, she told me to simply commit to the warm up. Five minutes. I could do that! She knew that if I committed to the warm up, by the time I was 5 minutes in I would most likely keep going and get my workout in for the day. She was right.

One night I knew I had a dinner to go to. I knew there would not be a healthy dinner option and there would definitely be a dessert table. She helped me get through the dinner without blowing the night and she helped me enjoy the dessert table without eating EVERYTHING. :) Knowing I had Tiffany to report to in the morning I enjoyed two bite sized treats and left the rest of the desserts alone. And I was rewarded on the scale the next morning. Awesome!

When I'm having a bad week, Tiffany helps me refocus. She lets me live a normal life and have bad days, but she doesn't let them last. She gets me right back on track. She understand that you don't have to cut treats out entirely, but helps me decide when it's really worth it.

She has literally been my BEST tool! She's a busy mom of FOUR who has done the work it takes to lose weight. She really gets it. She knows exactly how hard it is to eat right and fit workouts in while juggling kids and husbands and life.

Tiff's Before and After. Seriously! Check out those ABS!!!

Finding someone who gives you the support and encouragement you need is invaluable! I was losing weight on my own. I lost almost 13 pounds by myself in about 2 months. The first TWO WEEKS with Tiffany I lost about 7 pounds!! SEVEN! It's amazing what the right support and advice can do.

Tiffany and her sister, Heather, have a wellness blog where they share recipes and workouts and all kinds of great stuff!! Check them out here!

Lose It!

Everyone needs lots of tools to help them succeed at this weight loss thing. (Time out: My four year old son just walked up to me in my bra. I completely lost track of what I was thinking.)

Oh yeah, tools. (Oh man, focus. Quit thinking about the bra. Back to blogging!)

Lose It has becoming one of my favorite tools! For me, it's important to track my calories. But I hate counting. Hate it. I don't want to waste half my day looking up how many calories each food is worth and figuring out all the math. It's boring and I just don't have the time.

In the past I used Spark People (add that to the list of diets I've tried). It worked. I liked it. But it was sucking up too much of my time! On Spark People there are community forums, personal web pages, articles, and more. So much stuff! I found myself online half the day. So I finally just quit.

Lose It is different. It's simple. I add my foods. I see the numbers. I make choices throughout my day based on those numbers.

Here's how I use it. Each morning I weigh myself. I record the number on Lose It. Takes five seconds. I make my breakfast. I usually eat my breakfast at my computer desk while I check my email. I take another five seconds to add my breakfast. If I have a little time, I comment on a friend's progress or read their comments on mine. It's so nice to have the encouragement and support from others who are doing the same thing!

Lose It shows me how many calories I've consumed, burned, and have left in my "budget" for the day. Awesome!

And when I'm out and about, I have the Lose It! App on my phone. It links directly to my online account so I don't have to update things twice.

Summary? Things I love about Lose It:

*it does the math for me

*support and encouragement from friends

*it's not time consuming

*it has a huge database of food, including store brands and restaurant foods

*if it doesn't have a food, I can EASILY add it myself by copying the info from a label

*I can add my recipes (only takes a minute or two)

*it calculates calories burned from exercise AND daily chores, like house cleaning

There are several tools like this out there. Spark People, Lose It, My Fitness Pal. I'm sure they all have their own list of pros and cons. Lose It is the one that works for me. Join me there!!

mckennaralls (at) hotmail (dot) com

Cashing In on Rewards!!

I finally got around to treated myself to my 20 pound reward yesterday. And it was lovely! Payson was at school, I dropped Jack off at preschool, and Lucas was napping. I had two hours to myself and I knew just how to spend them!!

I got glitter toes. I know glitter toes are kind of old news, but I'd never done them before. I sort of love them! And then I got the new gel nails everyone is talking about that last forever. Because I'm a nail biter and I desperately needed a manicure!

Everything is more fun with a mani/pedi! I love watching myself type. Sparkly red nails are super fun! And every time the light hits my toes it makes me smile. :) My toes are sort of freezing right now, but I can't bring myself to put socks on and cover them up.

That reward seriously put me in a great mood yesterday. And today. And probably tomorrow too. It's got me re-motivated to keep it up and make it to the next 10 so I can treat myself again! And I could sooooooo use that massage!!

Checking In - Week 1

It feels weird to call this week one, since really, I've been doing this for a couple of months now. But this is week one checking in on the blog, so the title fits.

Anyway, weigh in this morning was good. I now weigh 196.8 pounds. That's down 3.2 pounds from Monday, November 28th to Monday, December 5th. Not bad!!

Goals and Rewards

Oobviously there's a goal weight I'm trying to reach here. But looking at that goal is reeeeeeally daunting sometimes. Because I'm talking about losing a total of 90 pounds. (One hundred and fifteen if you count from my heaviest weight!) And even with the 21 pounds I've lost since September, that leaves 68.6 pounds to go.

Almost 70 pounds?! That's going to take FOREVER!!!!!!!! Waaaaaaaaah!!!!!!

So instead of looking at the big picture, I'm trying to break things up. Ten pounds at a time. I can do ten pounds. It take a few weeks to a month, depending on how hard I work. But it's doable.

Now, what's the point of a goal if it doesn't come with a reward when reached?! That's the best part!! So I'm finding rewards for every 10 pounds lost. Little goals, little rewards.

For my first 10 pounds, I rewarded myself with a shopping spree. Well, sort of. I went to Target and stocked up on a bunch of workout gear! New pants, tees, undies, sports bras! It was actually sort of expensive. I should try to keep my rewards cheap. But it really was also a necessity. And it made me want to start working out again. I wake up in the morning and change into those clothes first thing. If I'm in them I'm much less likely to skip my workout!

I just reached my second goal this week. I haven't rewarded myself quite yet, but I'm hoping to get it in tomorrow when the two older kids are both in school. A pedicure!! I don't get them regularly, so for me it's a real treat! And pedicures are usually a summer thing. But having my toes done underneath my fall/winter boots makes me feel a little summery. :)

Next up? Thirty pounds gone. And since that's 1/3 of the way to my ultimate goal, I think I need a gooood reward! The plan? A massage of the professional variety. Well, sort of. There's a massage college not to far from here when I can get a pretty dang good massage for super cheap. You can bet I'll be working HARD for those next ten pounds knowing there's a massage coming!!

After 30 pounds, I'm not quite sure. I figure I can choose rewards as I go. Maybe it will be a good pair of running shoes, a fun new bag, or a girls night out with a friend. We'll see. And after a certain point, I'm going to need some "in between" clothes to wear until I reach my goal. Maybe that will be my half way reward. But choosing rewards to keep me motivated is important for me. Sure seeing the numbers decrease is a bit of a reward in and of itself, but I'm greedy. I need MORE!!

And simple "ten pounds at a time" goals aren't enough. You know "they" say you need to have measurable goals. Things like, "I will eat 3-5 servings of fruits and vegetables a day" or "I will exercise for 30 minutes at least 3 times per week". I have some of those too. And I mix it up with long and short term goals.

There are the simple ten pound goals, and there's the ultimate goal. And the ultimate goal needs the ultimate reward! I have to main ending goals. One is just to reach my goal weight. And when that happens the obvious reward is a shopping spree!! Right now I hate shopping. I hate trying on fat clothes that don't fit right. But that shopping spree should be a blast! Finally being able to shop for clothes in the "normal" range of sizes?! I can't wait!!

And my second big goal is to complete the P90X Challenge. When I'm in better shape and getting close to my goal I'm sure I'll need something tough like this to get me there. The hubby wants to do it, too. And by then I'll no longer be breastfeeding, so we are planning to dump the kids on Grandma and Grandpa and take a cruise together! We never really got to go on a honeymoon, so we're super looking forward to the idea of getting away like this. Hopefully next summer!!!

Focusing on the little goals and rewards and reminding myself of the BIG rewards coming down the road help me to stay focused when the will power is running low. And since next summer seems so far away, it's really nice to be able to tell myself I just have 9 measly pounds to go before I get that massage!!!

The Stats

Numbers matter. No matter what anyone says. They tell us where we've come from, where we are and how we're doing when we can't "see" or "feel" it. On days that I "feel" fat, the number on the scale might make me feel better.

Sure, it goes both ways. I might be feeling great and then step on the scale to see a gain and want to throw myself off a bridge. (Yes, I can be a little dramatic at times. So?) But then there are other things to give me a reality check. Like taking measurements, or looking at how far I've come from the beginning.

For me, numbers are usually a GOOD thing.

So I figured I'd better start with some. I know a lot of women are really uncomfortable sharing their weight. And sometimes I feel that way too. But really, what are we trying to hide? It's not like you can't figure out that I'm fat by looking at me! So who cares if the number confirms it!

I will be recording some starting numbers today. And then I'll check in weekly with new numbers to show my progress and keep those numbers on my sidebar. Easy enough?

So here they are:

My highest weight ever: 245 pounds

(9 months pregnant with Lucas)

My "starting" weight: 219.6 pounds

(this is what I weighed in September when I decided I needed to put some effort into this weight loss thing again)

My current weight: 198.6 pounds

(That's right! Since September I've lost a total of 21 pounds! That's with vacations, a major food holiday, and lots of parties in between!! Feeling pretty good!)

My goal weight: 130 pounds

(For my height I should weigh between 120 and 160 pounds. I've set my personal goal at 130 pounds. If I get close and need to adjust, up OR down, I will. But for now, that's the number I'm reaching for!)

As for measurements, I didn't actually think to take these at first. So as of today, here they are:

Bicep: 13.5 inches

Chest: 44.75 inches

Waist: 39 inches

Hips: 48.75 inches

Thighs: 29.5 inches

Yikes! Those are some BIG numbers!! But hopefully when I take measurements again, they'll be a little lower, right? Right.

I guess I should establish a check in day. Mondays are always good, right? So Monday morning it is! Can't wait to see my progress on Monday!!

The Plan

Here's the deal. I've bounced around from diet to diet. Dabbled in a little of everything. And they all work. As long as you're doing them. The second you stop, the weight comes right back, right? There are low carb/high protein diets, there's cutting dairy, there is the raw diet, there's the food guide pyramid or there's the plate, and there are all kinds of other ideas out there.

Just type "diet" into your google search and you'll find links to South Beach, Atkins, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, hCG, and that's not even all that are on the first page!! Check out this list to see how much crazy is out there. That's a list of 90 different diet trends! NINETY!!!!!!

This shouldn't be so complicated! The ONLY thing that works is the tried and true "eat healthy and exercise" plan. So that's my plan. To simply make healthy choices. I'm just sticking with the basics:

I'm drinking LOTS of water.

I'm eating protein (beans, nuts, seeds, legumes, eggs), lots of fruits and veggies, whole grains (oatmeal, whole grain breads and pastas, brown and wild rice, couscous, quinoa, etc.), and low fat dairy products (yogurt, cheese, and skim milk).

I'm watching my portions.

I'm MOVING my body. My goal right now is just to get 30 minutes of exercise in three times per week. Eventually I'll do more, but for now, at least I'm doing something!!

I'm not limiting anything! I have chocolate in my house and if there's a birthday party you can bet I'll be eating cake.

And last, I'm taking a multi-vitamin. Because I'm breastfeeding. And because it's just common sense!

When you lay it out like that it seems so easy. But the truth is: bad habits and emotions and hectic schedules and cravings definitely come into play. A lot. But I've got to find ways around all of that if this is going to last. I have to figure out what I'm going to do if I've had a bad day or if I'm stuck out running kids around and can't make a home cooked healthy meal.

But it's possible! I can do this. I've got a plan. :)

The Back Story

Hi! My name is McKenna. Allow me to introduce myself. Long story short, I'm a mom who is trying to lose weight. A lot of weight. Now are you ready for way to much information? Because with me, there's no such thing as "long story short". :) So here's the story:

I've been skinny my whole life. Not rail thin, not super model thin, but definitely thin. Although I have struggled with my weight and body imagine since I was way too young to be worrying about that stuff.

After high school I gained some weight. I was still thin, but at the higher recommended range of "normal" for my height. However, I did nothing to change it. I didn't work out. I didn't do anything about my eating. I would eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.

And then I got married in 2004. To my very bestest friend, Jason.

Here's us then...and here he is now.

(In that picture I am 20 years old and had gained about 20 or so pounds from my high school weight. But you can see I was still pretty thin.)

That's when two things happened. First, we were broke newlyweds and I just had to cook what I could. So I cooked what I knew. Creamy, cheesy, fatty, meat-filled casserole type meals. Just about every single night. And second, we got pregnant. Right away. No, it was not planned. Or prevented. We were young and stupid. But she's the best mistake we ever made!!

Here's our sweet little preemie surprise, then and now. Well, close to now. This was actually last year before school started. Isn't she stunning?? Love that girl!!

During my pregnancy I was sick. Not hooked-to-an-IV-the-whole-time sick, but sick like I was plastered-to-the-couch-and-puking-all-day-and-night sick. I literally laid on the couch for about 4 months straight watching reruns of Law and Order: SVU and running to the bathroom every so often. But somehow it didn't keep me from eating. I would eat anything I could keep down, whether it was coming up later or not. It was miserable.

And then finally about half way through the pregnancy it let up. So I did what I had heard about all growing up: I ate for TWO. Because that's what pregnancy was about! Cravings, eating whatever you wanted, and just enjoying this new phase of life!

Payson came a month early. In 8 months I had gained about 50 pounds. (I say "about" because we didn't own a scale so I really don't know my starting weight, but I'd guess somewhere around 150-160 lbs.) I weighed 204 lbs when she was born. Yikes! But I planned to breastfeed and had heard that breastfeeding just melted the weight right off, so I didn't freak out. Then unfortunately, because of several circumstances surrounding her premature birth, I wasn't able to breastfeed. So I hovered around 175-180 lbs.

I tried to lose the baby weight in between a couple of times. I even signed up for LA Weight Loss at one point. It was well out of our budget, but I did it anyway. And then on top of the initial costs, I couldn't afford the nasty bars and shakes and protein powders and such that came along with it. Eventually I just gave up.

After a couple of years we found ourselves pregnant again. And this time I was starting my pregnancy much heavier than the first time around. When Jack arrived I weighed 224 lbs! Twenty pounds more than with Payson! Ouch! I promised myself I would lose the weight as soon as Jack was born. And I vowed to do everything I could to breastfeed this time to speed things along.

Here's Jack's then and now. :) And the pudgy version of me that I had become. But aren't those blue eyes totally worth it?? And yes, my hair is naturally curly. Don't envy it. The grass is always greener on the other side!

After Jack was born, I WAS able to breastfeed, and it was actually true! Breastfeeding really did help the weight melt off!! At least at first. And then the weight loss came to a halt. I stopped right around 185 lbs again. So I joined Curves. I went as three times a week and eventually also signed up for their nutrition classes.

But somehow I let life get to me and I fell off the wagon again. I was back to 185-ish pounds again.

Then in late 2008/early 2009 I read a book called Eat to Live by Dr. Joel Fuhrman. I was so motivated!! I decided that I would become a vegetarian. I wasn't sure for how long, but I wanted to try it out. My dad had done it for about 3 years once and he lost a ton of weight and said he felt great! So I committed to doing it for two weeks and then I'd see how I felt.

In January of 2009 I also bought an elliptical machine. My husband's job took him out of town a lot so he wasn't home to watch the kids while I went to the gym and there was no child care at any gyms in our small town. So the elliptical it was!!

I started in February 2009. The first two weeks were tough. I really didn't like many of the recipes from Eat to Live, but I didn't know what else to cook! So I turned to the internet and found so many wonderful recipes! It was so easy to find something I enjoyed that was healthy AND meatless. After two weeks, I was actually starting to enjoy it and decided to keep going. I was building up endurance on the elliptical and had lots of energy with this new meat free diet.

Within 2 or 3 months I had lost about 30 pounds! I was so thrilled! I could SEE the difference and not just on the scale, which motivated me so much more! In May I went shopping for all new clothes and was fitting into much smaller sizes than the last time I'd shopped. I was so happy with how I felt!!

The first photo here was taken in late May/early June 2009 on an anniversary trip. The second was from family pictures that summer. Apparently I was in a hair-straightening stage. :) In these photos I still felt chubby and knew I had a lot of work to do, but I was really happy with how my body was changing.

Sometime that summer I started eating meat again. It was just easier with a meat eating family. I got lazy, I guess. And I wasn't working out as consistently. But I was maintaining what I'd lost fairly well, which I was happy with.

And then that fall we decided to get pregnant again. I was nervous about the pregnancy weight gain, but I decided to just work hard to keep the pregnancy gain to a healthy range this time around and then get back to work as soon as the baby arrived.

We were thrilled when we got pregnant right away! I was super tired, but not too sick in the beginning. We went to California (where I grew up, actually) that Thanksgiving with my family and I was even managing my weight on vacation. I hadn't gain or lost anything, which felt pretty good.

Here I am in line for the Matterhorn with my cute baby sisters. Still a little chubby, but not bad considering I was pregnant and was down from a high of 224 pounds!!

I was a little worried about the holidays, but I had done fine at Thanksgiving and on vacation, so I knew that if I tried to be good through December I would be fine. I kept using the elliptical here and there and doing some work out DVDs in between. I was eating meat, but not eating too much. Managing a pregnancy was the new goal, not losing weight.

I had my first appointment in December of 2009. I was 3 months along. We took the kids with us to hear the baby's heartbeat. When they couldn't find it I wasn't worried. This had happened with Jack. They had done an ultrasound and we had seen his little heart beating away. I was sure this would be the same. They brought in the portable ultrasound machine and couldn't find the heart beat. That's when I got nervous.

So they sent us in to the ultrasound tech to have a larger scan done. After a couple of minutes (that felt like hours) of silence, the tech just said, "I'm sorry". And went to get the midwife. I was devastated. And maybe that's an understatement.

There were some complication with my miscarriage. In April 2010 I finally had a D&C to resolve the issues. At that point I know I had gained weight but I didn't care. I was in a dark place. I was too focused on my grief and loss and worrying about getting pregnant again.

Which happened fairly quickly. We got pregnant again in May! Again we were thrilled, but this time terrified as well. We had learned that pregnancy didn't always end in a baby, which made it difficult to get too excited this time around. Although I was pretty confidant that things would be fine.

They weren't. I miscarried again in late July. This time was even harder than the first to get through. And again, I ate my feelings. I didn't think about my weight gain at all. I just didn't care. We took off about a week later to Lake Powell with the family. It was a perfect escape. I needed to be surrounded with people I loved and just forget about life for a little while.

Strangely, this is the only picture of me I could find from that Lake Powell trip. Still chubby. Okay, let's face it. Not just chubby. I'm fat. And I'm on the floor of the houseboat picking up a bat with a plastic baggy over my hand. It's a weird picture. But hey! My hair looks good and I'm tan!! :)

After Lake Powell I decided I was tired of being sad and mad and everything in between so I started trying to lose weight again. I just needed something else to focus on. I was eating healthy and drinking lots of water and starting to work out again.

It lasted about 2 months. And then in late October/early November 2010 I found out I was pregnant again!! Holy cow! They may not all stick, but we sure do get pregnant easy! I immediately stopped working out and started to see a high risk specialist. They put me on supplements and vitamins and meds to support the pregnancy, restricted me from working out, and monitored things closely.

The pregnancy went well in the beginning. At about 7 weeks we found out there were two babies, but one's heart had already stopped beating. I was so grateful for the baby that was still growing! But I was terrified we would lose that one too. I was very detached from the pregnancy. It was really a strange experience.

About halfway I started to feel more confident. I was gaining a LOT of weight, but I wasn't focusing on my health at all. And then in March of this year we received another blow. My best friend's 8 week old daughter passed away very suddenly and unexpectedly. Without going into details, I'll just say that this was the hardest thing I'd ever experienced in my life. Harder than my miscarriages. And I hadn't even lost my own child.

After some time and counseling (I dealt with some post traumatic stress disorder from Sammy's death), things got a little better. It has been a difficult couple of years though.

I had started my pregnancy with Lucas at about 185 lbs. And I had gained more during that pregnancy that I had with any of my others. By the end of my pregnancy I was 245 pounds. That's more than 100 pounds more than I should weigh!! It was not pretty. And I was miserable.

This picture is me and Payson at her dance recital in late May 2011. I'm about 7 months pregnant here. And I'd gained a LOT of weight!

Finally, in July our sweet baby boy arrived! He brought us so much joy and healing! More than I ever could have imagined.

This is our little Lucas the night he was born, and again in October. Look at the sweet, smiling baldy! I could just eat him up!!

Lucas brought so much change with him. Jason noticed it while we were still in the hospital. It was more than just that initial sleep-deprived baby bliss. He really brought such joy back into our lives after two years of so much pain.

After a couple of months of healing from his birth, I realized that I needed to do this NOW. I need to get myself back into shape and living healthy NOW. I need to make myself a priority. I need to learn how to live healthy even when life is really, really, really hard.

This picture is in early September. The belly might be bulging a little less, but not by much. And the arms/face/everywhere else are still the same size as the last picture. Yuck! And as you can see I'm still fitting into maternity clothes more than 2 months after Lucas was born.

So I got started. In late September I started to focus on my eating again. My best friend was getting on the South Beach Diet. I bought the book and a recipe book and decided to try it along with her. I just needed SOMETHING to get me focused again.

Now if you've kept track at all, this would be the third "diet" I've mentioned. There was Curves, LA Weight Loss, and South Beach. Somewhere in between there was the Eat to Live book, Dr. Phil's weight loss book, and a few others. Then there were the DVDs, as well as trying to lose weight on my own several times.

After about a week or so of following the South Beach diet, I felt like I was really back on track. But I was eating a LOT of meat. I started thinking about Eat to Live again. I realized that every time I've tried a "diet" it has only worked short term. The best success I'd had was as a vegetarian. I'd felt better then than I ever had.

So in October I ditched the meat, this time with a commitment. Not as an experiment. And I started doing what I've done before. Sensible eating. Moderate exercise. And some other things I've learned along the way.

And that is where I am today. Here. And now I'm adding to it. I'm blogging the journey. I'm giving myself a place to record, to be accountable, and to share. So there's the back story. Didn't believe me when I said I don't do "long story short"? Betcha do now!!

If you're like me and somewhere in the middle of this journey to health, I hope you'll stick with me. Maybe we can share some tips and tricks along the way and reach our goals together!